We arrived on time at 9:30 am Wednesday the February 1. Our appointment was for 10am, so we did not have to hurry off the train, run to find our driver and head to the embassy that had a new address Dima nor the driver had ever been to before.
We could not be late. Concession, this was our regular Kiev driver who came in a van, old, albeit roomy, and the heat worked well. That is when he didn’t have the window down because of smoking. It’s always something, isn’t it?
I had woken up that day with a new resolve and a new attitude. The first thing I did was INSIST that Oksana take my gloves. She did. Then I proceeded to just talk to her and love on her as if we were best friends. She began to warm up and respond. She actually grabbed my hand while walking through the train station. Hhmmm…. Progress.
We managed to locate the new building for the US Embassy. Dima was impressed, a new building, quite large and very esthetic looking. I saw a long line and was discouraged. How long would we have to stand in the cold in that line to get in?
Dima walked us right to the front of the line to the authorities, announced I was an American doing an international adoption and I had a 10 am appointment. The Ukrainian police guy had a clip board and along with another guard, checked the list for my name.
This was one of the rare times I was GLAD to be an American! Most the time you wish you were one of them, able to understand what was going on, and move around without difficulty and/or assistance.
The line was very long, filled with Ukrainians vying for Visa’s, a very lengthy process, and first come first serve IF you have your documents in proper order. I was glad that was ONE nightmare I didn’t have to walk out.
We were given permission to enter. We went through security, out the back end, down a steep set of steps and into another building, past security again, and then to a waiting area. Within about 10 minutes we were given a number and asked to wait again. After another 15 minutes, we were called to a window and then walked through the process with an American Embassy agent, who was Ukrainian. I know, don’t ask!
This was BY FAR the most pleasant part of the process! Actually, it was just the handing in of our submission for visa, and exit of the country and entrance to the states with a newly adopted child.
It took all of about 45 minutes. Dima was waiting outside. Just as I was feeling sorry for him, enduring the cold, much like what Oksana and I had done all day Tuesday, I noticed he was sitting in the van with guess what??? YES!! The motor was on and HE had heat!! Hey, what about the mother from America and the poor orphan child? Why didn’t’ we get heat while waiting with the driver for Dima all day on Tuesday as we gallivanted around the eastern part of Ukraine?!?!
No point in asking, just get in and get moving. We had to make it to the the doctors office by 12:30 for her exit medical exam. Off to the doctor’s office.
Arriving there, we found a hall full of people, many of them Americans who had come for the same reason we had-the exit medical exam.
Oksana was nervous. Dima assured me this was the best doctor, the one we got. He was fast and thorough, no hold ups. Dima was asked to leave the room and Oksana to strip down to under clothes for the exam.
Her eyes got wide and she protested. She was scared, she had not been to a doctor was my guess and to strip for a man was not going over. He stepped behind a curtain of course, and I reassured her it would be ok, I was right there.
He did the exam, quick and simple, she was relieved.
Good to be done and out of there. We hopped in the van and headed to the apartment, the same one Arlin and I had back in September when we were here for Valera. Yippee!!! I LOVED this place, right on the main drag of the square in the center of Kiev, it was the best place to be.
Downstairs a block away was the McDonald’s with the ‘coffee bar’ Starbucks style, and great coffee! Plus I could sit at the window with my laptop and watch all the people walking up and down the main avenue as I worked.
We dropped off our bags and headed out to a restaurant for a late lunch early dinner. On our way, we stopped at a vendor underneath the streets to buy a pair of gloves for Oksana. Finally!
The three of us sat for almost 2 hours and chatted, well Dima and I chatted. I was so relieved to be to this point the process. There was just one glitch; I had forgotten the notarized copy of our home study. I had to get Dima to text Arlin and have him call to find a copy and have it scanned and emailed to the embassy. We prayed they would accept a scanned copy from the states because if they didn’t this meant I would not be coming home on Friday, not until probably Tuesday or Wednesday of the next week, Ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I had a glass of wine, I don’t remember, I wanted to celebrate. Oksana sat quietly the entire time. He smoked, I drank and we laughed, a ton of stress releasing going on. This process again, for the 10th time… it’s absolutely GRUELING!!!
To my knowledge, only one more kid to go… Tolek. This had now become like a job. I know everyone keeps saying, “You hop back and forth to Ukraine like it was next door!!”
This being my fifth trip in 10 months, my 3rd in 6 weeks, believe me, I’m feeling it!!!
I paid the bill; we stood and hugged good-bye for now. As we exited the restaurant, Dima headed toward the subway station and Oksana and I headed back to the apartment.
I was a bit nervous, what were we going to talk about for the next several hours. It gets dark around here by 3-4 pm, so until we went to bed, we had each other to look at.
As we arrived and got settled in, we sat down at the kitchen table, I pulled out my laptop and she said, “Google translate.”
I went to Google translate and we began talking! I told her she could ask me anything about me she wanted to know and by the way, anytime she felt ready, she could call me mom. Up until that point, she had been calling me Deborah.
From that moment on, she hasn’t called me anything other than mom. Whew! We chatted back and forth for quite awhile asking each other questions, actually laughing and communicating. Her walls were coming down and we were beginning to talk. This was a beginning, albeit small, still progress.
We showered, she watched some TV while I worked and listened to music on my IPod.
Arlin called, and when I handed her the phone she said, “HI DAD!”
I was blown away! She never called him Arlin. They spoke for a few minutes, she understands much more English than Valera did, she is not a blank slate when it comes to English. She’s not able to speak it well, but she does seem to understand quite a bit.
He had asked me how I was doing. He noted that I didn’t seem very excited, wasn’t I happy, thrilled, elated? No I told him, I was processing, we would speak more when I came home. I just didn’t know how to explain to him what I was going through.
He had bonded with Oksana from the first moment he saw her back in September when we were at the orphanage for Valera. He was ready to ditch the siblings (the twins, not Viktor) for her. I was not. I was going forward with this child in deference to his wishes, HE had chosen her, and I was following.
He just didn’t comprehend. I didn’t try to explain, how do you?
We went to bed; we had another appointment at the embassy the next day at 2pm to finalize everything....
We could not be late. Concession, this was our regular Kiev driver who came in a van, old, albeit roomy, and the heat worked well. That is when he didn’t have the window down because of smoking. It’s always something, isn’t it?
I had woken up that day with a new resolve and a new attitude. The first thing I did was INSIST that Oksana take my gloves. She did. Then I proceeded to just talk to her and love on her as if we were best friends. She began to warm up and respond. She actually grabbed my hand while walking through the train station. Hhmmm…. Progress.
We managed to locate the new building for the US Embassy. Dima was impressed, a new building, quite large and very esthetic looking. I saw a long line and was discouraged. How long would we have to stand in the cold in that line to get in?
Dima walked us right to the front of the line to the authorities, announced I was an American doing an international adoption and I had a 10 am appointment. The Ukrainian police guy had a clip board and along with another guard, checked the list for my name.
This was one of the rare times I was GLAD to be an American! Most the time you wish you were one of them, able to understand what was going on, and move around without difficulty and/or assistance.
The line was very long, filled with Ukrainians vying for Visa’s, a very lengthy process, and first come first serve IF you have your documents in proper order. I was glad that was ONE nightmare I didn’t have to walk out.
We were given permission to enter. We went through security, out the back end, down a steep set of steps and into another building, past security again, and then to a waiting area. Within about 10 minutes we were given a number and asked to wait again. After another 15 minutes, we were called to a window and then walked through the process with an American Embassy agent, who was Ukrainian. I know, don’t ask!
This was BY FAR the most pleasant part of the process! Actually, it was just the handing in of our submission for visa, and exit of the country and entrance to the states with a newly adopted child.
It took all of about 45 minutes. Dima was waiting outside. Just as I was feeling sorry for him, enduring the cold, much like what Oksana and I had done all day Tuesday, I noticed he was sitting in the van with guess what??? YES!! The motor was on and HE had heat!! Hey, what about the mother from America and the poor orphan child? Why didn’t’ we get heat while waiting with the driver for Dima all day on Tuesday as we gallivanted around the eastern part of Ukraine?!?!
No point in asking, just get in and get moving. We had to make it to the the doctors office by 12:30 for her exit medical exam. Off to the doctor’s office.
Arriving there, we found a hall full of people, many of them Americans who had come for the same reason we had-the exit medical exam.
Oksana was nervous. Dima assured me this was the best doctor, the one we got. He was fast and thorough, no hold ups. Dima was asked to leave the room and Oksana to strip down to under clothes for the exam.
Her eyes got wide and she protested. She was scared, she had not been to a doctor was my guess and to strip for a man was not going over. He stepped behind a curtain of course, and I reassured her it would be ok, I was right there.
He did the exam, quick and simple, she was relieved.
Good to be done and out of there. We hopped in the van and headed to the apartment, the same one Arlin and I had back in September when we were here for Valera. Yippee!!! I LOVED this place, right on the main drag of the square in the center of Kiev, it was the best place to be.
Downstairs a block away was the McDonald’s with the ‘coffee bar’ Starbucks style, and great coffee! Plus I could sit at the window with my laptop and watch all the people walking up and down the main avenue as I worked.
We dropped off our bags and headed out to a restaurant for a late lunch early dinner. On our way, we stopped at a vendor underneath the streets to buy a pair of gloves for Oksana. Finally!
The three of us sat for almost 2 hours and chatted, well Dima and I chatted. I was so relieved to be to this point the process. There was just one glitch; I had forgotten the notarized copy of our home study. I had to get Dima to text Arlin and have him call to find a copy and have it scanned and emailed to the embassy. We prayed they would accept a scanned copy from the states because if they didn’t this meant I would not be coming home on Friday, not until probably Tuesday or Wednesday of the next week, Ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I had a glass of wine, I don’t remember, I wanted to celebrate. Oksana sat quietly the entire time. He smoked, I drank and we laughed, a ton of stress releasing going on. This process again, for the 10th time… it’s absolutely GRUELING!!!
To my knowledge, only one more kid to go… Tolek. This had now become like a job. I know everyone keeps saying, “You hop back and forth to Ukraine like it was next door!!”
This being my fifth trip in 10 months, my 3rd in 6 weeks, believe me, I’m feeling it!!!
I paid the bill; we stood and hugged good-bye for now. As we exited the restaurant, Dima headed toward the subway station and Oksana and I headed back to the apartment.
I was a bit nervous, what were we going to talk about for the next several hours. It gets dark around here by 3-4 pm, so until we went to bed, we had each other to look at.
As we arrived and got settled in, we sat down at the kitchen table, I pulled out my laptop and she said, “Google translate.”
I went to Google translate and we began talking! I told her she could ask me anything about me she wanted to know and by the way, anytime she felt ready, she could call me mom. Up until that point, she had been calling me Deborah.
From that moment on, she hasn’t called me anything other than mom. Whew! We chatted back and forth for quite awhile asking each other questions, actually laughing and communicating. Her walls were coming down and we were beginning to talk. This was a beginning, albeit small, still progress.
We showered, she watched some TV while I worked and listened to music on my IPod.
Arlin called, and when I handed her the phone she said, “HI DAD!”
I was blown away! She never called him Arlin. They spoke for a few minutes, she understands much more English than Valera did, she is not a blank slate when it comes to English. She’s not able to speak it well, but she does seem to understand quite a bit.
He had asked me how I was doing. He noted that I didn’t seem very excited, wasn’t I happy, thrilled, elated? No I told him, I was processing, we would speak more when I came home. I just didn’t know how to explain to him what I was going through.
He had bonded with Oksana from the first moment he saw her back in September when we were at the orphanage for Valera. He was ready to ditch the siblings (the twins, not Viktor) for her. I was not. I was going forward with this child in deference to his wishes, HE had chosen her, and I was following.
He just didn’t comprehend. I didn’t try to explain, how do you?
We went to bed; we had another appointment at the embassy the next day at 2pm to finalize everything....
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